I stared in the mirror. I had never seen eyes as cruel as the ones that returned fire. What had happened to me? I was falling apart. I could handle that. But my marriage? That was precious. I would not allow my marriage to fall apart. It was time to buy myself a bouquet of dead flowers. I was moving on.
Awaken The Giant Within by Anthony Robbins is one of the classic self-help books that have spawned thousands of derivatives. This review is of the abridged audio version of that classic book and I want to start by explaining the difference between an ‘abridged’ version of an audio book and an ‘unabridged’ version, because before I bought this book I didn’t know the difference myself.
Basically, an ‘abridged’ version is an edited version of the real thing. A bite size chunk if you will. Whereas an ‘unabridged’ version is the entire thing. I thought I was buying the entire thing and was left disappointed when the tape stopped running after just 90-minutes. Live and learn. I won’t be making the same mistake twice.
I have stopped smoking, stopping drinking alcohol, stopped gambling, stopped taking drugs, stopped eating rubbish and stopped watching pornography. My life structure is stronger as a result of each of these choices; but each choice came with a sacrifice, each road carried with it several obstacles that were determined to stop me dead in my tracks.
You may know these obstacles as relapse. A word that is banded about when people struggle to create a consistent approach to the creation of new and improved habits. Relapse is an exceptionally important part of the process of creating positive change in your life. If you are capable of moving a destructive habit so far into the back of your mind that it loses it’s ability to see; then all power to you. For the rest of us there is relapse.
When I stopped drinking alcohol my friends and family said that I had changed, but I hadn’t changed at all. I was the same kid who yearned for acceptance in a schoolyard of kids who insisted on paying attention to the slits that I called eyes.
We all have to defend ourselves otherwise we die. I defended myself by assuming control. I pushed my forehead into the faces of anyone who dared call me names, I used my voice to grow 6-inches taller and I screamed confidence from every hair on my body.
I got into the car and I had two bananas in my hand. One was for my partner, who was driving the car, and the other was for me. She pulled the stick back and off we went. I pulled back the skin from the banana and started to eat.
“Can you open mine for me as well please?” Asked my partner, and I duly obliged.
I often wonder if shy, retiring people have a shy and retiring brain? I talk an incredible amount of bollocks, and so does my brain, so perhaps the reverse is true? For years, I have tried to find the switch, but to no avail. It doesn’t matter what I do, the voice still keeps on jabbing away. Sometimes it comes up with the most amazing ideas, other times it creates the most disgusting, shallow, serial killer type thoughts – but most of the time it just spouts nonsense.
Top Tip #1 – Get Organised
Growing up the eldest of four children in a council estate called Poets Corner meant that my parents didn’t have much money to spend on gifts. My mother had to spend her time caring for us, whilst my Dad spent as much time as he could at the grindstone earning money to put food on the table. So without the vast array of electronic gizmos that children seemingly take for granted, these days, we had to be creative.
When I was a lad all I ever wanted to do was play football, but I never owned a ball until I was 11-years old. But children adapt, and they don’t allow minor irritations like a ball to prevent them from playing football; the hallway doors made excellent goalposts and a pair of rolled up football socks made an excellent substitute ball. I spent hours booting that sock into the face of my little sister, and they were some of the most enjoyable experiences that I remember. Interestingly, my sister has a different memory of the entire thing.
If you don’t schedule time to review your goals, the chances are high that most of them will not materialise. Instead they become no better than your annual New Years resolutions. Reviewing your goals is arguably more important than the setting of the goal itself. It’s a checking system created to help your sub-conscious find the right path. Here are five important lessons I have learned after just completing my own summer review.
1. You cannot manage what you cannot measure